Hello Everyone! Hope life is good for you as we ramp up speed for 2017. Today I have something on my mind that we all have to deal with and it just isn’t fun. Disappointment. There is a good chance that if it hasn’t happened to you yet this early in 2017, then it is lurking just around the corner.
Today I am disappointed and, dang, it’s just a little thing, but it is really eating at me and I can’t figure out why. Back in December I signed up for a “sew along” event online to a) add some new, much needed items to my pitiful wardrobe and b) to keep my mind and hands busy during the winter. With the sew along event you get a discount on the patterns that are going to be featured. Well, come to find out this morning, I did not receive the one main pattern discount code that I wanted. Evidently, it went out the end of December and the deadline to order was January 1. Somehow, even though I was registered, the email did not get sent to me.
When I emailed the coordinator of the event she apologized, but said there was nothing she could do until the next coupon codes go out in February or March. MARCH!! This is for a sweater! By the time I get it made I won’t be able to wear it because it will be SPRING here!!
Honestly, this is just a minor disappointment…supposedly. Or it should be. But it has pissed me off all morning, like eating at me. Why? Maybe because I have made a commitment this year to look after myself better. Part of that commitment includes getting rid of the ratty clothes in my closet and adding some nice, very specific pieces back in. I was looking so forward to making this sweater this month to have to wear for the rest of the winter. I actually planned for two in two different colors.
I think the other reason is that I gave myself a specific budget on the clothes and now this throws off my budget if I buy the pattern at full price or pick another pattern to make as a substitute while I wait for the new code. Maybe I’m just disappointed that I’m not going to have that new sweater to wear when I want it.
Yuck, that is probably the root of disappointment. Not getting something you want WHEN you want it and EXPECTING a certain outcome that doesn’t happen. This past weekend I had a conversation that I EXPECTED to be a fun conversation. Somewhere along the line it took a turn and I was disappointed in how it all ended. After half a century of walking and living on this earth, I would think by now I would know how to avoid setting myself up for disappointment.
Should we have EXPECTATIONS? It seems like we should. But why? Looking back over the past few years there was a time when I let go of expectations and was rarely disappointed. The downside of that time is it was a very dark chapter in my life and I had experienced one life blow after another to the point that I was frankly afraid to expect anything positive. Now, life is good and I have let myself fall into looking for certain outcomes evidently. How do you keep a positive attitude, but without expectations??? Someone more enlightened than me needs to jump into this conversation. I have had several disappointments recently. None of them huge or life changing disappointments, but they have caused reactions in me that I did not like so it seems to be a ME problem or one of those times when the universe thinks I need to learn a lesson. Don’t you just hate those?!
Feel free to add your insights. I’m pretty sure this is a universal problem not just mine, even though it is feeling like it right now.
Have a fabulous week…but don’t EXPECT a fabulous week. 😉
Photo credit Théotime Guéneau
I feel for you and with you! But unfortunately I have no solution either because I tend to fall into the same trap. :-p I try telling myself that it’s all in the attitude, and attitude is something I should have under control. That’s when my brain laughs at me and pulls its tongue out…
Elena, it’s at least good to know we aren’t alone!
Elena, I love, love, love your vintage sewing machines. If only things were made that well and beautifully now!
Thanks! My thoughts exactly. 🙂
There’s a new view on self compassion look up Ted talks on you tube. If you accept that life is a mixture of good and bad then it makes it less personal which takes the sting out of things because there’s balance – try to look foe evidence when things went right for you it’s easy to pass them over because only the disappointments hurt enough to make you remember x
I will have to look for the Ted talk. Thanks!